In this world.. we are just a grain of sand.. a data.. we are just... humans... taht is what I learned from the story my thrid year english teacher told me about... which I have just acceptedjust now.. I did accept it before but not that much... experience childhod... being illusionized by the teachings and shows of the people... being told what they have wanted you to know or what they wanted you to believe... which some are true and some are not... a life in a dream... a perfect dream.. a dream in which when you grow up would be a train like nightmare that will hit you right in the face and heart which would shutter you and leave you commatosed.. not literaly commatosed but it is far more severe than the literal one... accpeting somethings in your life are hard... everyone do... even accepting a neighbor that is quite unique and different is an issue on us...
let me refresh you in this... "emo", "punk", "goths", "nerds", and "dead kid" are just some of the names we call other people which are "weird" for us... words that we really doesn't understand... people whom we also doesn't understand... instead of names... don't you think it is better to give them understanding? yes it is esy said than done and that hardness is the reason we always do the wrong thing... which for other people are easy to do but it is a nightmare to leave in that life... yes it is easy... for just a moment... a temporary happiness. While doing the right thing is far more harder but results to somehow unlimited and permanent happiness....
Me... I live yes... but not that happy as others think and not that lonely as others think... yes, i accept i'm not that handsome nor that smart nor to good in my talents... but i'll tell you.. i'm a person... a human... and humans need understanding... I did not say this just for me... but for everyone... maybe my life won't be that long.. but realizing my mistakes and making others happy... it is okay for me... no one knows how I feel and what I'm experiencing, that they call me in many names and laugh about me... a time in which people treated me as a shadow... a wall... just an air passing by... they treated me like a robot... expecting me not to have emotions... expecting me not to be hurt... expecting me that I'm numb and that i do not care... I'll tell you.. I care a lot... you just won't give people, you thought are weird, opportunities... you just judge by the cover then just leave the book unread inside... a reality in which I hardly accept and thought that i can change... a reality in which I am shuttered...
February 14, 2009. The day in which somehow reality sinks in me... everyone dies but not everyone truly lives... everybody expects to be understood but were not understood... many expects to loved but not everyone were loved... a reality which is hard to accept... but it is the truth... to give everything in something is a somehow a good thing especially if it is for a good reason but we shuold also expect that what will return will not be the same as what we give... something which defies the law of physics... the law isaac newton...
February 14 2009. A day in which my heart once again give me a signal... a signal of death.. signal of reality... a painful heart ache which opens a way to reality... somehow.... A valentines day to be remembered... a day to be realized and to be thought of... a day of revelations.... Everyone hopes and dream.. but only few achieves...
*I know many would react on this blog or won't mind this blog. But I tell you. Blogs are made to express ones self, to express ones ideas. right? till next post.*
